if you were born into an immigrant family, the topic of allowance wasn't even a topic...
"so let me get this straight...you want me to pay you to make your bed and clean your room, or better yet - for nothing"!? "Wake up kids, your dreaming".
now just say that with a portuguese accent and with a look of disgust , several stories about milking cows at 3am in bare feet with a sprinkle of "if you ask again you might get spanked")....we NEVER ASKED AGAIN!
every saturday i did chores (can I get an amen from all my portuguese ladies from the ages of 32 to 48...we all did this. i swear the portuguese community united and made it "THE RULE" ), and not just make your bed BUT real chores and every single night i did the dishes. period.
oh fuck, don't feel sad for me. why? because it taught me to work for the mad cheddar. if i wanted candy, i would collect bottles from the garbage bins around elk lake on Sunday's after swimming with my cousins. it was rather lucrative, recycling wasn't a "hip thing" back in the 70's as it is now! there was no shortage of sugar when we went camping three times in the summer as we would bank the cash and buy till we were sick!
if i needed money as a preteen for clothing or a movie, they would provide that without issue. this process taught me a really good work ethic. i pitch in. i help and i'm a DO'er.
my kids don't get allowance! SHOCKER.
"what on earth for? No really, you want me to give you money every week for nothing"?! aaannnd this is where i turn into my parents!
if you want to attend rep soccer, swimming, musical theatre, have play dates, go to birthdays, menchies after school or plain old vacations you need to pitch in (and not once in a blue moon BUT EVERY WEEK!) and that is without getting paid, your payment is us providing you with all these amazing things for FREE. what a deal!! we pay for these activities and give our time for you to do all these things and all you need to do is help at home.
guess what, i don't care if my kids hate it, i don't care if me kids hate me while their doing it...this is life skills that their building and my job is NOT to be their best friend or their maid. my job is to grow them into independent adults, strong and thoughtful! i'm happy to say, they don't whine, they know what they need to do and they do it.
now here's where i'm different then my parents....my kids official job is school! This is where I will pay them for working hard and achieving good grades. They get paid well, if they do well...we only pay for A and B's! (C's are not worthy of cash-they are standard fair).
report cards came in today and it was PAYDAY.
proud to say, that the money they earned went straight into the bank within 20 minutes of it being handled over. right now, they have a healthy respect for money, i hope that it sticks with them (because is this vancouver housing market they need to start saving now! lol).
life unscripted family sessions.....