it's a place i never want to go to, no one does! it's never our choice, we are brought here against our will. this place has no bottom, no beginning and appears to have no real end. it takes a piece of you and never gives it back. there is no warmth here, you are left to drown in it's cold, dark, overwhelming stench of sorrow.
sometimes we see the sea of pain coming but this time it was as though we awoke there, without preparation for the oncoming tsunami of destruction about to over take our small village.
it's the kind of ravaging that leaves you bare, helpless, on your knees looking to the sky casting blame on that invisible puppeteer pulling the strings of life and death. silence, only silence in between my venomous cry's of anger and why's.
as i stand in it's water, knee high in it's grasp, I see her, she appears to be staying afloat in amongst it's destruction. the waves are taking her down…out of sight and slowly bringing her back up to my watchful eye. i can't save her. helpless, i can't even get close to her pain. she's getting out of sight again, i yell to her "I'M HERE FOR YOU, REACH OUT YOUR HAND". i work fast, tossing her "my"rope, it's woven of love, friendship and strength. she's holding it and for that i'm grateful. my grasp is solid, i will go hungry before i let go.
even if she did, i would throw her another one woven of fuck you, i'm not leaving you here alone and i'm here to help shoulder your pain.
warmth? feels strange in this place…it's my village, they are here, shoulder to shoulder, knee deep wading in it's hell beside me, they are all casting ropes woven of their strengths to keep her a float.
i feel powerful in our numbers, in our will to keep her spirit comforted. i'm not delusional, i (we) can't take her out of it's unforgiving arranged marriage of loss but our ropes will give her strength when she is to weak to swim, some light through it's suffocating darkness, nourishment when she can't find the will to eat…to hopefully help her find some kind of peace in this unnatural place.